Hell’s Greatest Dad is a song from adult animated series “Hazbin Hotel” season 1 episode 5 “Dad Beat Dad”. The song is sung by Lucifer Morningstar, Alastor and others and performed by Jeremy Jordan, Amir Talai, Kimiko Glenn and Sarah Stiles.
Hell’s Greatest Dad Lyrics
Lucifer Morningstar: Looks like you could use some help
From the Big Boss of Hell himself
Check out Daddy’s glowing reviews on Yelp
(Lucifer Muppets: “Five Stars!” “Flawless!” “Greater than great!”)
Oh, with a punch of a pentagram
I wap bap boom, alakazam
Usually, I charge a sacrificial lamb
But you get the family rate!
“Thanks, Dad”
Who needs a busboy now that you’ve got the chef?
(Woh-oh-oh!)
Michelin tasting menu free a la carte
I’ll rig the game for you because I’m the ref!
Champagne fountains
Caviar mountains
That’s just a start!
Alastor: Who’s been here since day one?
Who’s been faithful as a nun?
Makes you chuckle with an old-timey pun?
Your executive producer
Charlie Moringstar: That’s true!
Alastor: I’m your guy, your day-to-day
Your chum, your steadfast hotelier
Remember when I fixed that clog today?
Niffty: I was stuck, thank you, sir!
Charlie: Oh you!
Alastor: I’m truly honored that we’ve built such a bond
Charlie: Aawww!
Alastor: You’re like the child that I wish that I had
Lucifer: Uh, what?
Alastor: I care for you just like a daughter I spawned
Lucifer: Hold on now!
Alastor: It’s a little funny
You could almost call me
Dad!
Alastor: They say when you’re looking for assistance
It’s smart to pick the path of least resistance
Lucifer: Others say that in your needy hour
There’s no substitute for pure angelic power!
Who just happens to also be your blood!
Alastor: Sadly, there are times
A birth parent is a dud
They say the family you choose is better
Lucifer: What a bunch of losers!
Alastor: Can you butt out of my song?
Lucifer: Your song? I started this!
Alastor: I’m singing it, I’ll finish it!
Lucifer: Oh you tacky piece of—!
Mimzy: It’s me!
Yes, it’s me!
I know you were all waiting for me!
I’m here!
What a gas!
Took a while but I’m present at last!
It’s me!
It’s me!
Mimzzzyyyyyyy!
Lucifer: Who?